Loose Some Wait Honey

Boy: Do you know you would look more sexy with one kg less.

Girl- Ok Sweatheart, I'll loose it as soon as possible.

Boy: In my opinion all your clothes weight exactly one kg.

God Bless You

It's the thing that satisfies
your mind, body & soul!

Do it on bed, on a sofa,
in the car or anywhere!

It's called Prayer!

God bless your naughty mind.

Allow Me To Kiss Your Lips

Allow me everyday

"to kiss your lips,
to feel your teeth,
to feel your tongue."
and your SMILE!

This is your friend "PEPSODENT" reminding you to brush your teeth,Twice a day :)

Like father like son

Dirty Mind

A short thing
its get longer as you hold it
& pass between woman's breast
& enters into a small hole
What is it?





Its car seatbelt 

Who Knows Horsepower Like He Does

Guess These Words

The New Dictionary

Websters come out with a new dictionary to reflect the modern times. Here are a few highlight of what's inside

• ADULT: A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle.
• BEAUTY PARLOR: A place where women curl up and dye.
• CANNIBAL: Someone who is fed up with people.
• CHICKENS: The only animals you eat before they are born and after they are dead.
• COMMITTEE: A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.
• GOSSIP: A person who will never tell a lie if the truth will do more damage.
• HANDKERCHIEF: Cold Storage.
• INFLATION: Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.
• MYTH: A female moth.
• MOSQUITO: An insect that makes you like flies better.
• RAISIN: Grape with a sunburn.
• SECRET: Something you tell to one person at a time.
• YAWN: An honest opinion openly expressed.
• WRINKLES: Something other people have. You have character lines.
• TOMORROW: One of the greatest labor saving devices of today

Proton, Electron And Neutron

Definition Of Kiss

Prof .of Economics

Kiss is that thing for which the demand is always higher than the supply.

Prof. of Accountancy

Kiss is a credit because it is profitable when returned.

Prof. of Algebra

Kiss is infinity because two divided by nothing.

Prof. of Geometry

Kiss is the shortest distance between two lips.


Prof. of Physics

Kiss is the contraction of mouth due to the expansion of the heart.

Prof. of Chemistry

Kiss is the reaction of the interaction between two hearts.


Prof. of Zoology

Kiss is the interchange of salivary bacteria.

Prof. of Physiology

Kiss is the juxtaposition of two orbicularisoris muscles in the state of contraction.

Prof. of Dentistry

Kiss is infectious and antiseptic.

Prof. of Philosophy

Kiss is the persecution for the child, ecstasy for the youth and homage for the old.

Prof. of English

Kiss is a noun that is used as a conjunction, it is more common than proper, it is spoken in the plural and it is applicable to all.

Prof. of Architecture

Kiss is a process which builds a solid bond between the two dynamic objects

Prof. of Comp. Science

What is a kiss? It seems to be an undefined variable

College Life Vs Hollywood Movies

• College - JURASSIC PARK
• Principal - DRACULA
• H.O.D - HULK
• Lecturer - BLADE
• Lab - PLANET OF APES
• Lecture Hall - SLEEPY HOLLOW
• Library - CHAMBER OF SECRETS
• Canteen - JUST LIKE HEAVEN
• College gate - AT THE WORLD'S END
• Guys - BAD BOYS
• Gals - CHARLIE'S ANGELS
• Romance - TITANIC
• Syllebus - DEEP BLUE SEA
• Series exams - STAR WARS
• Internals - PRESTIGE
• Exam - WAR OF THE WORLDS
• Cheating in exam - DARE DEVIL
• Invigilator - TEMINATOR
• Results - JUDGEMENT DAY
• All pass - MISSION IMPOSSIBLE

(Thanks Darkon)

Updated Financial Terminology

CEO –Chief Embezzlement Officer.

CFO– Corporate Fraud Officer.

BULL MARKET — A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius.

BEAR MARKET — A 6 to 18 month period when the kids get no allowance, the wife gets no jewelry, and the husband gets no sex.

VALUE INVESTING — The art of buying low and selling lower.

P/E RATIO — The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps crashing.

BROKER — What my broker has made me.

STANDARD & POOR — Your life in a nutshell.

STOCK ANALYST — Idiot who just downgraded your stock.

STOCK SPLIT — When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets equally between themselves.

FINANCIAL PLANNER — A guy whose phone has been disconnected.

MARKET CORRECTION — The day after you buy stocks.

CASH FLOW– The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet.

YAHOO — What you yell after selling it to some poor sucker for $240 per share.

WINDOWS — What you jump out of when you’re the sucker who bought Yahoo @ $240 per share.

INSTITUTIONAL INVESTOR — Past year investor who’s now locked up in a nuthouse.

PROFIT — An archaic word no longer in use.