I LOVE YOU

TOP TEN REASONS MEN DON'T SAY "I LOVE YOU"

1. They don't mean it.
2. They want to get laid, but not *that* bad.
3. Their fathers didn't say it to their mothers.
4. It has become a throw-away phrase.
5. They don't want to be trapped in some long-term thing.
6. They've said it before and found out they were wrong.
7. They think it is much cooler to say it to other men, like Sammy and Frank.
8. It will lead to "I'll marry you".
9. It has become a throw-away phrase.
10. If they say it, their penises will fall off.

TOP TEN REASONS WOMEN WANT MEN TO SAY "I LOVE YOU"

1. They like the words.
2. Girls, at times, think that the "words" are important.
3. They can brag to their friends that they got him to do it.
4. It makes them feel all tingly to hear it.
5. Commitment/Power evil grin
6. He ain't gettin ANY unless he does.
7. It makes up for what a jerk he is the rest of the time.
8. It makes sex better.
9. The woman can say it back without risking rejection.
10. The woman wants to see his penis fall off.

via

Best(stupidest) Pickup Lines

Is your dad a terrorist?
Cause ur the bomb.

Your dad must be a butcher,
cause ur a fine piece of meat.

Are your parents aliens?
Cause there’s nothing like you on this planet.

Are you a parking ticket?
Cause you’ve got fine written all over you.

Can i borrow your library card?
Cause i wanna check u out.

Do you believe in love at first not?
If you dont; let me walk by again.

Do you have a bandaide?
I scraped my knee falling for you.

Better call God,
He’s missing one of his angels.

Did it hurt?
Falling from heaven?

Do you have a map?
Cause i got lost in ur eyes.

Are u a burglar?
Cause u just stole my heart.

I’m not drunk,
I’m just intoxicated by you.

Were you arrested earlier?
It’s gotta be illegal to look that good.

Ya know, you look really hot!
You must be real reason for global warming.

Damn, if being sexy was a crime,
you’d be guilty as charged!

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If I were you I would never use these :)

Romantic 1st lines.... Deadly 2nd lines

A local newspaper ran a competition asking for a rhyme with the most romantic first line... but the least romantic second line. Here are some of the entries they received.

I thought that I could love no other
Until, that is, I met your brother.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.
But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl's empty and so is your head.

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Of loving beauty you float with grace
If only you could hide your face

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Kind, intelligent, loving and hot;
This describes everything you are not

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I want to feel your sweet embrace
But don't take that paper bag off of your face

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I love your smile, your face, and your eyes -
Damn, I'm good at telling lies!

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My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:
Marrying you screwed up my life

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I see your face when I am dreaming.
That's why I always wake up screaming

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My love, you take my breath away.
What have you stepped in to smell this way

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My feelings for you no words can tell,
Except for maybe "go to hell"

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What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts vodka, one part lime

If you have any other such rhyme, leave it in comments bellow